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English, Hindi, and Malayalam

41 | Married | Writer

I battled infertility for five years before giving birth to my son in 2015 via IVF. The journey inspired me to write a memoir called 'What's a Lemon Squeezer Doing in my Vagina?' (Penguin 2021). Since the publication of the book I have had many, many conversations with women who are currently fighting infertility or have in the past and offered them my support and understanding; I have addressed IVF doctors about the need for empathy and sensitivity in dealing with those going through fertility procedures and I have had conversations with organisations providing mental health and emotional support for those undergoing infertility.

Infertility and its treatment carry a great deal of shame and stigma. As a result, most couples try and maintain absolute secrecy about the medical procedures and the physical and emotional cost of experiencing them. I felt completely alone and ashamed while going through my IVFs, IUIs, and miscarriages. There was hardly anyone to talk to, even those I spoke to could only offer generic, well-meaning platitudes such as 'Relax, it will happen'. They could not grasp the intensity of what I was going through. As a peer, I hope I will be able to provide a safe, non-judgmental, empathetic space for others to talk about infertility. I am also happy to share my own journey of healing, overcoming shame, and owning my truth through writing. 

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